5 o'clock in the morning

I've begun to notice that 5 o'clock is when I wake up every morning in a cold sweat. No matter how much or how little I've slept that is always what occurs. That is when she normally turns over toward me and we fall asleep all over again. It was when she reassured me, told me she loved me and made me feel like I belonged in that place. Those are the things I miss most. I'm determined to return to that. Kendall Rae Vickers l know I wasn't a perfect man by any stretch of the imagination, heck I wasn't a man by many accounts, but I'm getting better. I'm motivated, determined and focused on loving you through missing you. I love you more and more everyday. I know you are frustrated with the animosity and anger and the way things had been. But I'm guaranteeing you that it won't ever be like that again. My BPD will be under control, it will not be the cause of fights, anger, emotional imbalance and insecurity, mood swings and poor self awareness. I'm gaining control everyday with the way that my therapy is going along with my reading tools. Don't forget to remember me babe, don't forget to love me. I'm going to earn your compassion and earn your trust back. I can't wait to hold you in my arms again. I love you. I hope you are sleeping well right now in preparation for your test. I miss you baby.