My new dawn

I saw Red Dawn.

That movie has hit me so hard I'm literally in tears as I write this. That movie has shown me how wrong I've been living. I was so selfish, so pigheaded, so prideful I couldn't see it. I was so terrible to people when I didn't even stop to think of those who have given up so much, who have lost so much so that I won't ever have to feel that feeling. To all of you I am so sorry. I wish I could let all of you know in person how bad I feel for the behaviors and actions I put forth. They were a horrible representation of me, of who I want to be. We have so many people serving this country who don't even have the opportunity to go home at night. They can't get into arguments with their significant others, they don't have the chance to kiss them or hold them or tell them how they feel day to day. The can't see their kids and parents. They have given up so much so that life would be seen for how precious it is. Not for people like the person I used to be to take it for granted, to think that everyone owed them something, that they were a victim.

Watching that movie I thought of all the servicemen and servicewomen I know, my older brother and brother in law included. I thought of how much they have sacrificed, how much they miss out on so that I can experience it. But instead of learning that long ago I'm learning it now while I struggling to fight for and hold onto the things I hold dearest to my heart. I think of the constant danger they're in, the constant uncertainty of whether tomorrow will ever come. I'm sorry to you all. You all deserve better out of me and our of all of us Americans. We can do better. We can love stronger, think clearer, act more rational, unite closer. We don't have to be the mistakes we've made. We can pay our respects by being the best class of person we possibly can be. I am devoting myself to it. This movie has really changed my life. It's pushed me further toward who I need to be to have happiness, love and the people I want in my future there next to me. I was wrong, I was flawed, I did live life less than I should have. But that was then, this is now. I love this country, I love those that serve it. I am forever indebted to you for your character and the decision you have made. You are all a shining example of what men and women truly should be. I will be better, not only for me, for my love, my family but for all of you who can't go home at night. You deserve it. I promise you your sacrifice and impact on this country will NOT be forgotten or taken in vain. God bless America. God bless you all.

Dare to Believe. Dare to Dream. Dare to Risk it All. In the end it will be worth it. Embrace life, it is not guaranteed. Tell people you love them because you don't know if you'll have another chance.