The price of love

Love is hard, it's a serious commitment and decision to see one as perfect through all of their imperfections. Things don't always happen like they do in Hollywood. But one thing is for certain. Love is worth it. When you find someone that overcomes all boundaries and causes you to see yourself as more than one person I've begun to see myself as a man. No longer do I think of my self image negatively. I see my own worth through the salvation that is her love. I know things are hard and I feel devastated but "god will take you through hell, just to get you to heaven" has never had more meaning to me. I can't stop crying, I want to sleep but my dreams will be nightmares. I miss her, I wish that she was laying here next to me. That she was with me. Time heals all wounds but this is the worst wound I've ever had. I honestly feel like I was hit by a bus. I've thrown up twice. I miss her so much and I'm sorry that I caused that. I am responsible. I'm to blame.